Suffering and God!!!!

Lots of questions have been going through my mind this last month about pain, suffering, illness, and heart ache. Many people ask "Where is God in it all?!"

If you are in that place where you are wondering and questioning, I am Sorry you may not find all the answers in my humble blog! But you may find comfort in what I share!!

This last month I have paced hospital corridors whilst a loved one was in surgery, I have been laid up in bed with sever back pain, I then once  again walked the long corridors of another hospital visiting another loved one who was suffering!
I have listened to dear friends going through loss and anxiety, I have attended too many funerals in
these last few months which has made my heart ache for those who got left behind.

And yes I have got mad with God to the point where I thought what's the point of talking to Him anymore!!
I have started to read again a book called Jesus Calling I haven't read if for a couple of years. as I opened it up the other day it led me to this well known verse,

John Ch.16 v 33 I have told you these things so that in ME you may have peace. in this world you WILL have trouble. But take heart I have over come the world.



There it is, in black and white Jesus warning us that there will always be trouble in this world we have to expect it! But in the midst of that trouble if we let Jesus in to whatever our struggle or pain is he gives us the peace to cope with it.
In the hospital wards when I was pacing I would go down the 'what if road' 'what if they die' etc I
started to feel anxiety, when I started praying and giving it to God I felt peace.

Another challenging verse I read is 'Draw near to God and He will draw near to you!' James ch 4 v 8
I know I have been ignoring God and running away from Him or just telling Him what I think he should be doing!!!I miss His closeness then rant about God not being there when all the time it has been me moving away from Him!

When I stop and let God in, peace gradually seeps in and I realise afresh my deepest need is not to have answers but just to be close to the one who has it all in His mighty big hands!!

So maybe not answers to deep questions but just a thought that maybe I/we need to let God be God and keep talking and questioning Him and yes get angry with Him ( He can take it he has mighty big shoulders!!) as long as we keep communicating with Him we are still walking with Him, we just need to let Him in.
Let his closeness bring you peace x